Monday, December 19, 2005

Forbidden Fruit

It should be illegal to work on Monday's. But then Tuesday would be the new Monday because nobody would want to work after having a long weekend. Oh well. Work itself should be illegal. Who ever the fucking over-achiever was that decided work was an essential part of living, is an asshole!! Why can't we all still be roaming the earth naked, living in huts, hunting wild animals for food, and picking fruit? (that was a rhetorical question, so please don't comment with some sort of technical answer outlining the details of history, thank you)
Our doggy lost 2 of her teeth, one of which was found on our bed. She hasn't been acting herself the past couple of days and I couldn't figure out why. Now I know it's because she's teething!! It's like having a baby all over again, except this one walks on four legs.

Anyway, when we showed Ethan Rusty's tooth he said, "You can put your tooth under my pillow, Rusty. And we'll put your tooth money in my piggy bank, but the Tooth Fairy is cheap, she only leaves a dollar." That's my little shit!
It really irks me when I call a business and the person who answers the phone doesn't say his/her name. I think that saying your name as part of the greeting is professional and should be done at ALL companies. I went to help work the front desk for a physician in the group I work for. One of the ladies who regularly works the front desk NEVER states her name when she answers the phone. So I asked her why and her response was, "If I tell them my name then they'll remember it and bug me every time they call." All I'm saying is she's lucky I'm not her boss.
It also irks me when I hear people say they've got "sugar" or "thyroid" when they're describing a medical condition. Who the fuck ever thought, "Instead of saying I've diabetes, I'll just say sugar 'cause it's easier." It must be an old people and southern thing because I've never heard anyone use it except them.
The End.


Bill said...

He should be happy the tooth fairy still visits. Next tooth, leave him a qurter with a note that says that the value of teeth has declined because too many kids have been losing them this week. Just kidding.

You'll be happy to know that I always give my name calls I don't know at work. If I recognize the name or number, forget it, they can be happy I pick up. But since they are calling my direct line, they know who they are getting.

Hey what happened to the word verification?

Maine said...

"You've got a thyroid? Me too!"

You could always use this to your advantage. Next time you want to call in sick to work, just call with some ambiguous sickness named after a gland that they'll be trying to figure out all day, like, "Hey boss, sorry I can't come in today, but I've got the hypothalamus. I'll be in tomorrow."

You might even get a bouquet of flowers sent to you for that one.

Amanda said...

If we're going back to the good ol days of roaming the earth naked, I have two requests:

1) Matthew McConnaughey lives in my hut.

2) Matthew McConnaughey lives in my hut.

april said...

Bill-I did tell Ethan that he's lucky to be getting any money at all because the Tooth Fairy doesn't visit kids in the really poor countries. He asked why and I told him because they don't have pillows to sleep on. As for word verification, a couple of other people have taken theirs off and haven't gotten any blog spam, so I thought I'd try it. Isn't it nice just to be able to click publish without having to verify a bunch of goofy letters?

Maine-I could use this to my advantage if I didn't work for a DOCTOR'S OFFICE!! Silly Butt!

Amanda-Can I please live in your hut too? I'll hunt, pick berries, clean, whatever you want! =)

Bill said...

Since you work in a doctors office... just slur your illness to incomprehensibility... when they ask what you said; just say that you talk the way they write.

Of course remember to be carefull what you wish for... you may get some other Matthew McConnaughey... you know fifty, fat, and furry.

As for work... we need more robots and helper monkeys.

I do like the simplicity of not having to type after the message if I am logged.

Kira said...

But I DO roam the Earth naked...

Those of us with with mild dyslexia would like to thank you profusely for taking off the word verification. I can't stand it. I have certain techniques for dealing with my issues, and none of them work when I'm made to mimic a string of nonsensical letters. Thank you. Merci. Gracias. Etc.

A.J. said...

So if I asked you to "give me some sugar" I should expect a heapin' helpin' o' diabetes. Mmmmmmmmmmm-mmmmmmmmmmm!

schmims said...

I am soooo with you on the work thing. I sit at my desk all day long thinking of all the better ways I could spend my time. 12 days vacation just is not enough. I'm actually excited that I get to leave at 11:00 today. To go to the gyno.

The Lily said...

Rusty's a she? Where the fuckity fuck have I been?

If you were to say stuck up my man's ass... you'd probably be right.


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