Friday, February 17, 2006

Uterine and testicle piles to burn

One of the local radio stations is advertising a fund raiser to stop child abuse. I'm all for ending child abuse, I just don't see how it's possible. No one knows that a child is going to be abused. Of course we can speculate, but until the child has actually been abused, nothing can be done about it. So the question is, how do we put an end to child abuse? I have a few ideas......

  • Intense psychological examination of people. If they do not pass, they don't get to reproduce.

  • People in prison should get surgically fixed to not be able to reproduce.

  • When someone visits a methodone clinic, it should be mandatory that they get fixed so they cannot reproduce.

  • There should be stiffer penalties for people who do abuse children.

  • People with a history of abusing children should get their hands, feet and tongue cut off. Along with removing their reproductive organs.

  • Wow, that's a lot of unused reproductive organs, isn't it? All I've to say is thank god I'm not the president.


    Apparently there are ways to get Google to list your blog when someone is searching for something. JJ over at The Churning has made a whole post with a lot of useful tips. Cockzilla schmockzilla!!


    Also, this next topic is certainly a post or 100 all in itself, but I'm not going to get into it that in depth. Dark Damian has a post about his use of the forbidden "N" word. As a white woman, the use of this word just is not practical in any form. That is fine by me because it is very offensive and the last thing I want to do is offend anyone. Except for my mother-in-law, but I call her Crackhead and that seems to suffice. Anyway, I asked DD a question in his comment section as to what I should do when I'm listening to rap music that uses the "N" word often and I'm in the company of someone who might take offense to it? DD told me to read his friend Jess' blog. She has a post detailing her perspective as a bi-racial woman and the use of the "N" word. IT.IS.FUCKING.AWESOME!!!! For once, in a LOOOOOONG time, I was at a loss for words. My husband would gladly tell Jess thank you for that. Apparently he thinks I talk too much. Sheesh!! Anyway, I wanted to share both of those wonderful posts by DD and Jess. If you have the time, please check them out.


    Oh and I was told yesterday that I'm starting to get a country accent. BULL MOTHERFUCKING SHIT!!!!! Y'all come back now, ya hear!!


    Dark Damian said...

    Awwww...April, you're pimping me! And I so appreciate it. You my ni-GAH!!!

    Itchy said...

    I've had a country accent*...welcome to my world. :D

    *I would like to state for the record that my hubby does not think I have a country accent and we are from the same county. He asked me if I'd always lived in WV when we first met. That made me happy...

    JJ said...

    Thanks for the link! You're the cat's pajamas.

    Regarding your child abuse prevention suggestions:
    I've always felt that it's way too easy for scummy people to have kids. You need to apply for a license to get a gun, to vote, to drive, to get married - but anyone can shoot sperm in a cooch.

    So I say scientists should invent some kind of birth control that everyone gets when they're born that is totally reversible. You want to have kids? Apply for a kid license and get the birth control antedote.

    dukethor said...

    I would agree with the "kid license", but I would have a rather harsh application process to be acepted, and I doubt a lot of people would like my ideas on what makes a good parent.

    Other than that, my cousin moved from Portland, Oregon to Buttfuck, Tennesee, and ended up with a horrendous accent that he still doesn't realize he has. Poor bastard.

    Kira said...

    I started dropping all my g's on the ing words. Once upon a time I was walking and talking. Now I'm walkin' and talkin'. Rats!

    As a former foster care worker for DSS, I would like to state that the only surefire way to reduce child abuse is to give me a sterilization gun and have at it. I've advocated this one for a while, and nobody has yet to provide me with one. Sucks.

    In all honesty--and I realize totally that this suggestion would be shot down by many people--I think that in order to take your child home from the hospital, you should have to sit through a couple of classes. These classes should include lists of resources. For instance, the parents should be made aware that if they are poor, they are eligible for X type of assistance...if they have temper control problems, they have THESE places to go...and if they are ignorant of child development, there are THESE classes to attend. It won't fix child abuse, but we genuinely had some ignorant fucks at DSS who didn't know any better since their parents had abused them. Sometimes, knowledge breaks the cycle.

    And for the rest, esp. the sexual abuse perpetrators? I recommend a dragunov. POW! A mile away, and they're STILL dead. Issue me one of those with the sterilization gun.

    NWJR said...

    Child Abusers? I have the perfect solution.

    Drop 'em off one by one, naked, in the middle of the African savannah during dinnertime for the lions.

    Whatever happens, happens.

    Maybe we could get Marlon Perkins to narrate from the helicopter: "While I'm sitting up here mixing a martini, BillyBob Fuckdick is being eviscerated by the noble male lion. Wow! Listen to those screams! That's really something!"

    Yeah. I'd watch that.

    Lisa said...

    YeeHaw baby!!! Lovin the link to ya!

    Rumblin Durango said...

    Ugh... Child Abuse. A touchy subject. Too much secrecy involved, too many things happening in the shadows. Punishments can run the gamut, but, they'll just never solve the problem. Defective people go on being defective. It's that whole "society" thing we live in, deal with, put up with. Like old ladies. They are defective. We gotta deal with them, put up with them. OK, so child abusers and old ladies don't REALLY have anything in common, but the one umbrella they share is society. I'm not one to be pessimistic, but, I don't think there is a cure-all; what then? Education? Maybe, educating adults on their influence, educating children on their rights... who knows. Great stuff, as always, April. I'm finally reading these, you impressed?

    jess said...

    I get shit for my thick Wisconsin accent. I say embrace it, girl! Accents kick ass!

    Thanks for linking me, too. I appreciate it.

    JJ said...

    Tag. You're it.

    Maine said...

    I'm pretty much against the rampant use of the N word, but then again, I'm also not one to tell another adult what to do with their own mouth. People are gonna do what they're gonna do. My stance is:

    1.) Since I turned 14, and realized what I was saying, I've stopped using it.

    2.) Anyone uses it in a derogatory manner toward my family, they just fucked up for themselves.

    3.) Outside of that, do whatever you like. I'm not yer daddy, and I can't tell grown folks how to be.

    schmims said...

    Jude tells me I have a southern accent. I'm on the next plane outta here!

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