Ethan had a baseball game this past Saturday and his friend was on the team playing against Ethan's. Well his friend is the son of the Colin Farrell look alike (MILY) I dated a while back. Anyway, MILY was there with his new girlfriend and let me just tell you about this thing, I mean girl.
She was close to 6 feet tall with GIGANTIC boobs (I'm 99.9% sure they were fake). She had very short, dried and fried bleached blond hair with black roots. She was sporting very long, very fake, and very bright blue finger nails, with a very tacky tattoo on her hand of a pitbull's head. She was wearing a VERY low cut black tank top that showed about 10 inches of her watermelon titty cleavage. And her neck was adorned with not 1, not 2, not even 3, but 4 trashy hickeys. Her shirt was showing her belly which was conveniently over-flowing from the waist-band of her jeans looking like a tube of biscuits that was just popped open. Oh and did I mention that she's a stripper?
So yeah, this perfect epitome of trailer trash was walking around the baseball field. Please keep in mind that this is a CHILDREN'S baseball game.
There is a point to me providing you with such a horrible image in your head. I was having a conversation with MILY and his Trash when Ethan ran up to me:
Ethan: "Hey Mommy! Oh hey MILY!" Then he looked at Trash and got this confused yet disgusted look on his face and said, "Who's THAT?"
MILY: "That's my girlfriend, Trash"
Ethan made a little laugh then got a serious face and said, "WOW." Then he looked up at me like, what the fuck is THAT, and ran off.
You have NO IDEA how hard it was to keep from cracking the fuck up. They both just looked at me like I was supposed to do something about what he said. But hey, he's just calling it like he sees it, right?
Deep Throat of the Day: What the fuck is he thinking?