Thursday, July 23, 2009


I work with several idiots people who work our front desk. They never fail to amaze me every single day. This is not a 'WOW THAT'S FABULOUS' kind of amazement. No, this is the 'you make entirely too many mistakes and ask an insane amount of doltish questions to be working here for TWO DAMN YEARS' kind of amazement. The kind of amazement that just leaves you so dumbfounded. Almost in disbelief. Like, "Did she really ask me that?" or "Was that a serious question or were you just pulling my leg?" (be careful of which one you pull because you might just pull the damn thing off. badum-ching!)

These are not uneducated people. They're not fresh out of high school. They're not new to the work force. No no. They're the following: An Accountant by day and an Attorney who isn't currently practicing law because of family issues, but she's still board certified. That's right an ACCOUNTANT and an ATTORNEY.


Let me give you an example or two. The Accountant had 5 checks totaling $205. At the end of the night she's supposed to total up her checks and make sure she balances with the amounts she's entered into the system. So $165 worth of checks means that her report for the day should show $165 worth of checks posted. After that she fills out a deposit slip for the checks. The deposit slip should total the amount of the checks which is $165 in this case. She wrote the check numbers and amounts correctly on the deposit slip. Sounds good so far, right? Then she wrote the total which was NOT the $165 that it should've been. No. She wrote $205. Why did she write $205 when the checks only totaled $165? Because $205 is the amount of money in checks that were entered in the system. Which means that she didn't bother to balance her checks with the amount entered in the system. She didn't bother to add up the checks even after she wrote them on the deposit slip. That's an extra $40 in check money entered in the system than actual checks we had.

Where did this $40 come from? Well after an hour of trying to fix her mistake the next morning, I discovered the problem. There was $25 that should've been entered in the system as a credit card payment, which means that her credit card balances didn't match either. Then there was a $15 check payment arbitrarily entered into a patient's account who hadn't even been to our office in five years.

AN ACCOUNTANT MADE THESE MISTAKES! And this is just ONE example of the many, many mistakes she's made.

The Attorney is the one who always asks me the questions that shouldn't be asked by someone who has a brain worked here for two years. I could give you examples but then I'd have to go into some serious detail about how things work around here and I don't want to bore you any more than I've already done. Let's just say that it is beyond me how she ever managed to pass the bar. And I'm not being mean when I say that, I'm being serious.

Some days I feel like I'm in the Twilight Zone because I can't comprehend the utterly stupid shit these people say and do. I feel like it's a big joke being played on me. Or a conspiracy against me. Maybe they're not REALLY as stupid as they act? Maybe they're doing it to drive me to the loony bin? Then one day I'll go all ape shit on their dumb asses and Jack Nicholson will pop up like in Anger Management talking about how I passed some program and hand me a big ass plaque while everyone is clapping for me.

Do you guys work with any people like this?

Deep Throat of the Day: Is that a rhetorical question? <-my new response when the Attorney asks me a dumb question.


skywind said...

Wow, :)

Grant said...

Some of the people I used to work with had trouble getting through the door - not new people or in a new building either. We have security doors which require you to swipe your ID badge, then turn the handle and open the door during the few seconds the buzzer sounds. More than one person had to think about each move before doing it. It was like:
1) Approach door.
2) Pause and think.
3) Swipe badge.
4) Pause and think. (buzzing stops)
5) Turn handle.
6) Pause and think, wondering why door won't open.
7) Repeat a few more times.

clairebell said...

Yeah. I bet that was awesome to come back to after vacation.

Hubman said...

Yeah, I work with people like that. One of them has a Ph.D. I wish I was kidding.

tagskie said...

hi.. just dropping by here... have a nice day!

R said...

Accountants and Attorneys deal with numbers, and they CHOOSE to do so! This makes them abnormal by definition. :-)

Organic Meatbag said...

I can't even get started talking about the shitheads I work with because their incompetency greatly hinders my job in every way...uggghhhhh...

Anonymous said...

Luckily April had the opportunity to practice her "You did NOT just ask that" face by working with me for over a year. :-)

Love you!!
U know hoooo

PS - I figured out why I couldn't spell "cynical" the other day---too many ads for "zenical" screwed up my spelling gizmo. At least, that's my story and I'm stickin' to it.