Yesterday morning, my oh so cute dog, Bailey, decided she was going to eat something she shouldn't be eating. When I tried to get it out of her mouth, she ran away from me and jumped over the couch. I ran around the couch because trying to jump over it would have been a disaster and comical. The door to the large dog crate was open, but I didn't see it because it was dark. So while running I tripped over the crate door, some how cutting my finger and shoulder and scraping my knee. Then I slammed my face into the end table. The disaster was inevitable apparently.
After this happened, she decided to bark at me, getting all excited, and then head-butted me in my nose. Meanwhile Scotty, our "good dog" was laying next to me on the floor because I was sobbing like a baby from the intense pain on the left side of my face. I hadn't even realized that I cut my finger and shoulder.
All of this was after she woke up 45 minutes prior to the alarm clock going off.
She is so, so lucky I love her, that little bitch.
Deep Throat of the Day: Maybe she's like the dog version of Macaulay Culkin in Home Alone and set that shit up perfectly, like a trap? Sneaky dog.